Valentine’s Day Often Hurts Relationships
Family law attorney says it’s hard to live up to expectations; other 364 days forgotten
Monday, February 07, 2011
(San Diego) – Other than Cupid, there’s no one better qualified to give Valentine’s Day advice than San Diego’s most prominent family law attorney, who happens to be born on Valentine’s Day herself.
Myra Chack Fleischer, lead counsel and Family Law Expert, Fleischer & Ravreby, says Valentine’s Day may seem like a celebration of love and devotion that helps renew the bonds between significant others. But the pressure to “come through” with a grand gesture of love can be intense, and when someone fails to meet their partner’s expectations, it can hurt the relationship.
“One day a year does not a love affair make,” says Fleischer. “I see it far too often when dealing with divorces. You can’t make the big gesture on Valentine’s Day and think your relationship is “taken care of” until same time next year. When couples forget to make each other feel important the other 364 days of the year, the relationship is in big trouble,” said Fleischer.
“I see the end result daily of couples failing to value their relationships,” said Fleischer. “People get divorced because they grow apart. Yes, there is domestic violence, or infidelity. But a lot of divorces happen due to the simple fact people take their relationships for granted.
Fleischer says it’s nearly impossible for the average person to live up to the hearts and flowers hype of Valentine’s Day. “Men in particular will do nearly anything to stay out of trouble, sending flowers only because their girlfriend or wife will be angry if they don’t. This is ridiculous and it’s a little bit sad.”
“The best advice I can share is the advice I received from my mother the day before I got married. She said, ‘A ton of things will happen in your life that will interfere with your marriage. But if you always put your husband first, you will be married forever,'” said Fleischer.